Wednesday, October 30, 2013

How I perceive others and how others perceive me

Acceptance into a social circle is a necessity for normal human beings. Consciously you may deny it, but subconsciously you really need it. Few years ago I wrote, you can be a good person but don't overdo it. My perception of this still remains the same. I came across many posts in regards of "don't be a nice person, be a bad person. If a person cannot accept the bad side of things; that person is not worth being in your social circle." I may agree to a certain extent but I disagree to a large extent. Words can be a double edge word, it may bring a person to heaven or push someone to hell. That is why communication is a form of art and a knowledge to be learn. No one likes someone to treat themselves badly, everyone is seeking for kind, empathy and trust from others. Though some people perceive ignorance as a negative thing but to me, ignorance is the best medicine. Why must I inflect negative behavior onto someone when I have the choice to ignore? I may type this but I did behave badly in front of people who I felt uncomfortable with.

There is one thing about acceptance which I do not feel so good about. Subconsciously knowing that a group of friends refuse to accept me for who I am keep keeping me in a group where I aren't suppose to be. Maybe because I came to know what true acceptance from others feel like. My current classmates gave me the kind of acceptance which I thought it will never come back to me after my primary school days. This negative result may come from changes in character, perspective, environment and pressure that I faced. Maybe I'm fine with them putting me in a group but something that I am very uncomfortable with is that friends who think that they truly understand me and go round telling others they really do understand me. Actually it is a joke, you don't.

Another thing about being a nice person. Some people are just nice, as in nice to everyone. Yes it is a plus point and everyone likes you. But being nice against your will isn't it bad? I did over praise a few of my friends that "oh you are the nicest person on earth" or "you are the nicest person among my friends". It is a white lie actually because those people are actually people who hurt me the most but they are people who wants someone to tell them they are nice.